2026-05-08

CBT

“Yeah, CBT, I thought they were fuckin’ nuts, straight outta their god damn mind when they suggested it to me. Through CBT, I’ve acquired so much.”

Janet’s eyebrows raise. “Uh, CBT?”

Mike put it all on the table, as he sat on the table.

“Yeah, Janet! Look, don’t knock it till you try it. It’s not easy, and not something you can do on your own. Well, maybe if you’re really motivated you can. But it’s not usually something you can do on your own.”

Janet stood up. She briefly turned her attention to the cracked open door before meeting Mike’s gaze again. His ass firmly planted on her desk.

“So what, you just, go visit someone?”

“Well, you can, I did. It costs a lot of money, insurance doesn’t cover it.”

Janet’s eyebrows were alive and well today, raising the roof.

“Why would insurance cover that?”

Eyebrows were raising on every face in the room, for a moment anyway. Paul walked in the door. Eyebrows, level.

“Hey you chucklefucks!!”

Paul playfully punched Mike in his legs-spread-wide sitting position, square in the crotch.

“Mike! Dude, not cool.”

Paul bro laughed. “Bro, whatever man, let’s go get beers, it’s 4:30!” Paul hit mike with his hilarious asian accent “Unress, Mike-san know he cannotu out drinku Masta Paul-san”.

Janet, the head of HR, did what any head of HR would do.

“Okay, hang on a second Paul. Mike, who do you see for CBT?”

No one was sure if Paul didn’t hear Janet or didn’t care, but he said to mike

“TINKU FAST BIG MAN” and tried to once again punch Mike in the crotch.

Mike reacted. “Hey man, I need those.”

Janet piped up

“I bet you do. Listen guys, I got a meeting to get to, and I really need to hear from Mike for a moment here.”

They both stopped and peeped a look at Janet.

“Yeah?”

“What does CBT stand for?”

Mike responded,

“Beats me, the guy I pay called it that and I love it.”